Before the summer ends, you should go to the Carnival with me... Pt. 3: Merry Roundtrips

Merry Roundtrips
By: Robert "The CivILLian" Walters

I was, I was mesmerized
I was, I was hypnotized
Not to sympathize for the crooked guys
Whom held poker faces and snake eyes
With deception in every lieing line
But then, I dabbled in the rattling
Rackets and practiced in
Between the same spaces adjacent
To what attracted them.
Tried to escape, but ofcourse
I was, I was mesmerized
I was, I was hypnotized
Not to leave behind what I've kept in mind
The only option left is to abide
With my conscience then taking a step aside
So I do my dirt to live on earth releasing thirsty spurts
That blasts and hurts the worth of brain power afforded in this work
The best turn to worse, then lives in a hearse
Then catches a curse and is set for rebirth
I tried to hit reverse, But ofcourse
I was, I was memerized
I was, I was hypnotized
Not to live a lie, let the past subside
Though what I live is criminalized
With perjury every time I get tried
The irony is blasphemy that fastens me rapidly
To catastrophe for actively attaching these
Tragic themes passionately as a phylactery
Knowing it was attacking me and bashing me
But ofcourse...

Before the summer ends, you should go to the Carnival with me... Pt. 2: Emotion Coastin'

Emotion Coastin' (HIGHS's & LOW's)
By: Uriah "The CivILLian" Walters

She puts me at HIGH's and LOW's
Because I felt HIGH by her presence
Making me present presents in present time
So as to get more than a HIGH five
I can start with a HIFI HIGH pitched "HI!!!"
As I fly by
Subtly awaiting the kiss I'll receive on the moonlit HIGHRISE
And I may be highly ahead of myself
If I want to be her LOW day's HIGHLIGHT
I'm HIGHSTRUNG
But what if she smirks
Says "nice try" and "goodbye" to my acting shy
Pulling me down to LOWBLOWS & chokeholds of the LOWKEY
The strike of a LOWTIDE
LOW frequency though frequently,
HIGHTIME I'm LOWLY
...
now...
Should that make me a HIGH minded
HIGH spirited LOW profile loyalist
With HIGH sounding wisdom that showboats LOWLIFE HIGHRUNNERS?
But that's like being HIGHFLOWN, then lowercasing your HIGHBROW
Scoring HIGH levels in compromise
Succumbing to the LOWDOWN, (which by the way was HYPER lugubrious)
Then ending your day with a LULLABY from a HIGH born
One who obviously does not cope nor sympathize.
HIGHLY praised statistic shows a LOW percentage
Of the LOWEST of the lovesick
Deep in his LOWLANDISH pit
Unless he HIGHTAILS it out of there
and rearranges it to say...

She puts me at LOW's and HIGH's

*******

Quite quick and to the point with loops and curves. Sort of like a less wild Joker's Jinx, unless ofcourse you've experienced these words emotionally.

Before the summer ends, you should go to the Carnival with me... Pt. 1: Hall of Mirrors

Hall of Mirrors (Deflect and Ricochet)
By: Uriah "The CivILLian" Walters

Deflect and ricochet
Everything you see
For everything you see is but
Ricocheted and Deflected verbatim
Verbatim memory commision through mirror images
That mirror appearances 'til you commit 'em to memory
Panel to panel by heart is every reflection
From gullible naivete that slowly bends into erogenous erotica
Unfamiliar faces we get faced with as we pump the blood of impatience
Embracing the laces that strap together these visual mazes
Now all we do is pinpoint to these urges and cravings
Alerted to ineffable mirages of fragrances
Mesmerizing to painlessness
Blamelessness
Carelessness
Monotonous Embellishments
Until our conscience ponders the evidence of our innocence
Only to see the place we flourished as now a labyrinth
That holds a lab rat of claustro- schizo- psycho-
Proportional Un-abortionable In-decipherables
All due to the glance that led to defamiliarization
With thine own anatomy or insecure psyche
The main targets of the hypothesis questioning these anonymities
Scattering about loose comprehension sporadically.
Think about it, meditate it
Give it meditative thought litigation
So that by law you won't be submissive
To the curiosity that takes interest
And maybe, the true you will display
Once you learn to deflect and ricochet

*******

Note: Okay, .... :( I've been trying to "dumb down" my poetry so as to expand in my poetic prowess. Well, its not so much "dumbing down" but exploring unfamiliar sides to my writing. It's supposed to be a fresh slate where I pull the carpet of understanding from under the audience so that you don't get used to the pinballing.... But I couldn't help it, lvs. Consider this to be a fix.

Also this Hall of mirrors uses the rhyme scheme in a way to portray the reflection of oneself, so if you get confused at any parts don't worry about it, because that's supposed to happen. :)

CivILLian Brainables (Team of Wit) ... sounds like a cereal, lol.

Note: Left Brain = Intelligence
Right Brain = Creativity

Time to make a few... Vicissitudes

Left Brain: Interlude
Right Brain: Uh... yeah I thinks so

Just to escape the environment of timelessness where Simon Says I've been invited in...
Rather I start a riot in a dining bin full of hungry men dieing of starvation and....

...
...

Left Brain: Let's try again
Right Brain: Yeah, that's a good idea.

Just to esca...

Right Brain: No, no, no, wait... I got it.
Left Brain: What?
Right Brain: Let's just start over.
Left Brain: That's what we were doing.
Right Brain: Yeah but let's not use the same stuff. I'm talking really start over. A clean slate. Cool?
Left Brain: ... alright... I guess

Dumbfoundedness surrounds us when the profound has acknowledgements
But never pardons men of the bombarded demolished bricks
Hollow tips
Follow with
bitten tongues and startled lips
And if they start to slip the info, their life is departed quick.
A few hearts are slick as bottle tip artists in spewing thoughtful drifts
Within a thoughtless flip of parliament.
They said that theives and arsonists stole and got a spark of wit
dropped a lick of toppled bliss to the righteous optimist.
They said there was no stopping this
Because they're way too locked in this
And that the world was better off holding fear in their awesomeness
Catching these two is not an if
not a when
Just an impossible wish to those who operate to opt against
eachother...

Left Brain: ...
Right Brain: ... what?
Left Brain: Should we add more?
Right Brain: I 'on't kno...
Left Brain: Just answer the questi...
Right Brain: Do you think we should add some more?
Left Brain: ... -_-'... *sigh*
Right Brain: what? I'm asking an honest question
Left Brain: No, you do this every single time.
Right Brain: Do what?
Left Brain: You sit there and stay silent and wait for me to close out, just for you to say "Oh hold on, we should do this." And I sit there and wait, only to find you have NO ideas.
Right Brain: C'mon give me a break, no I don't.
Left Brain: Should we ADD more? Yes or No?
Right Brain: Hmm... *thinking*
Left Brain: ...-_-'...
Right Brain: I don't know.
Left Brain: *sigh* Oh my Lord
Right Brain: That's my honest answer man.
Left Brain: Okay then we're closing it out, right now.

*******End*******

Right Brain: Hold on man, I got it.
Left Brain: ... Why am I not surprised?
Right Brain: No I'm serious, I got it.
Left Brain: Okay, well what? Huh? What is it?
Right Brain: ...
Left Brain: ...
Right Brain: ...
Left Brain: See, what I'm saying, you're doing it once again.
Right Brain: No I swear I just head it in my head. It just slipped.
Left Brain: Oh really, well I'm not waiting for that.
Right Brain: It's not like you've done something like that.
Left Brain: Something like what?
Right Brain: Remember that time you tried to put together the "hate sonnet"?
Left Brain: YOU HAD THAT IDEA!!!!
Right Brain: NO I DID NOT...
Left Brain: Yes you did, and I can also recall you trying to stretch a 17 syllable poem...
Right Brain: ...haiku
Left Brain: ... Into a 17 page poem.
Right Brain: Yeah what's your point?
Left Brain: It's not a haiku if it stretches past 17 syllables.
*******both character voices fade at this point*******
Right Brain: Oh yeah, well what about the "peace flyt"?
Left Brain: Oh there you go again.
Right Brain: That was the worst idea you ever had
Left Brain: It would've work too, if you had better rebuttals
Right Brain: I didn't wr......

*******REAL ENDING*******

Note: I wrote this because people asked me what do I think about when i write and I honestly couldn't give them an answer. So let this just be an example of my thinking process when I write.

Thoughts vs. Feelings

Dreams
Thoughts
Theories
Paranoia
Conspiracies
Controversy
…
It's identity for love

What do you think is more important
The heart or the mind? (Non-physical)
Is this something to debate about?
Do we or should we even care?

There is an undeniable balance between these two
With one, we hold and access our greatest desires
Another, we consider and contemplate the same
Asking ourselves if this is what we're supposed to be feeling. I've noticed that people are basically afraid of what it is the heart displays. What it is we really want seems to be a reflective of who we really are, so just the thought of that can be scarier than facing your greatest phobia. Due to such a fear, the mind comes in to sort of organize the situation. We give ourselves an explanation for everything. Enter into a theoretical process of cause and effect with trial and error though none of the activities we think of leave our heads. For the longest I wondered why it was so, why did we operate in such an intoxicating way? The reason is identity. We have become so bent on trying to prove to the people surrounding us that we can live up to whichever reputation or title that our names hold. So used to a pat on the back that we don't dare to imagine how life would be like if it were gone.

Well after a series of a few events, I must say that what it is I have to prove to folks is not a determining factor for me. I can't say I have nothing to prove, otherwise I'd have no will to write. What I'm trying to prove is this voice that I constantly project. No matter how "unsound" my speeches are, I must say I can't regret anything I've ever said to a person, I try my best to come from the heart. But why I do things is not the reason to my current thoughts. I'm wondering over yonder like an explorer, trying to find out why we bite our tongues.

One of my friends asked me if loving someone was determined by your feelings or by time. I don't know why he asked me that. How many relationships have I been in (seriously) that can qualify me to know what I'm talking about? Anyway, he said that most people believed time was a factor yet he himself begged to differ. He views it as a risk, to which you don't know what you're getting into.

So with that being said, let's say someone takes the risk of throwing themselves out there, only to get rejected. What do you do now… move on or break down?
((asking too many questions means I'm thinking too much but don't worry, I'm pulling it together.))
A lot of people breakdown, and once they recover they move on… natural cycle. The next person they pick up feelings for, they might be hesitant to let them know, because they just might get rejected again. If the very thing we're afraid of is rejection, then that just might be something with the identity, wondering if they'd look at us any differently.

Now if this keeps on happening with each person we run across, then what are we to think of ourselves? Why do we keep extending our hearts out 1 person at a time? If it's that yearning need to be with someone then that may just be the problem there... insecurity, which leads back to identity. But I can't bash all the people we tend to pick feelings for, because a crush is legitimate enough for us to get cut some slack. It's just this fear that grabs us each and every time, the one that makes us afraid to be who we are and forces us to conform to our surroundings, so believe it goes beyond telling someone how you feel.

Well my friend thinks that is subconscious, meaning we automatically resort to these devastating thoughts…

…So I ask you, which is more important, what we think (mind) or what we feel (heart)?